Who Hurts More After a Breakup? Here’s Why Men Hurt More After a Breakup
When a relationship ends, it can feel like a loss that will last a lifetime. Even if you’ve worked hard to build trust, the fact that you’re now alone can be heartbreaking. You may experience a number of emotions, such as sadness, denial, and anger, in the aftermath of your breakup. And, of course, there’s a whole lot of guilt swirled in there, too.
Men tend to hurt more after a breakup, according to a recent study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. While it’s common for men to be less emotionally invested in relationships, this study suggests that they are also more likely to suffer from emotional pain after a breakup than women are.
The study, conducted by researchers at Binghamton University in New York and University College London in the UK, surveyed 5,705 people from 96 countries and asked them to rate their physical and emotional pain on a scale of 1 to 10 after they had experienced a breakup. The results found that men were more likely to report feeling “unbearable pain” following a breakup than women were.
Getting over a breakup can be difficult, especially if it’s been a long time since you last dated the person you broke up with. Depending on your age, the length of the relationship, and how much you cared for your ex, it can take some time to adjust to life without them.
If you have a good support system, you’ll likely find that talking to them about your breakup will be helpful for your healing. But it’s important to remember that the goal is to move on, and the sooner you accept your situation and begin to let go of all your anger, the sooner you can move forward.
1. Make a list of your reasons for the breakup.
A breakup can be very difficult to deal with, so it’s helpful to have a reason for your feelings of rejection. Whether it’s something your ex did that you believe led to the breakup, or something about your own behavior in the relationship that was unhelpful, this can help you process your emotions.
2. Think about the positives of the breakup.
If the two of you shared a lot of positive experiences together, this can be a great motivator for trying to get back together with your ex. It may also help you refocus on what makes you happy, and to make plans for the future that include new, healthy relationships.
3. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help if you need it.
In a culture where relationships are viewed as “forever,” it can be easy to overlook the fact that a breakup is a real, physical loss. But, as Dr. Dardashti explains, this kind of heartache is actually a chance to heal and refocus your energy on the things you love and want in your life.
4. Losing the hopes and dreams of a future together is painful, but it’s important to remember that your future will be full of other possibilities.